Menopause…and other cancer gifts

Ahhhh menopause… flashes, insomnia, menopausal arthritis, and did I mention the hot flashes? Cancer gifted me with forced menopause. It started with chemo and sealed the deal with a total hysterectomy.  Hot flashes are brutal, especially living in the sunshine state. One minute you’re just fine then boom! Someone’s thrown you into a friggin furnace 🔥 

It’s worse now that I’m post surgery. I’m trying to recover but between hot flashes, insomnia, joint pain and fatigue I feel like I’m swimming through hot bath water with weights strapped to me.  Cancer has aged me and it totally sucks. But I’m alive. So I’m trying my best to manage my new normal. Easier said than done sometimes. I’ve made changes and there’s more changes that’ll have to happen. 

Speaking of changes, I know I’ve said this before but it bears repeating: Cancer changes everything. Takes from you too much. Gives you gifts you never wanted. It changes you inside and out. My outer visage has definitely changed. Menopausal weight gain. Dry skin. Swollen painful joints. Gray hair. Not that I’m interested in coloring it. Dark circles under my eyes and new wrinkles.  

It’s 11:45pm and I’m once again still awake. Damn insomnia. I went from falling asleep if I sat longer than 5 minutes to this.  I can thank menopause and cancer for this. The insomnia that is. Brain thinks too much and the body fights sleep. 

I suppose I should get off my phone and try and sleep. 

As always #FuckCancer 


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